Twitard – A fan site for twilight fans with a sense of humor

I did not realize there was a Twilight graphic novel coming out. Nor did I realize that it wasn’t out YET.
However, I found out there was the graphic novel when my cousin came into work with it and I made her go out and buy me a copy…and then later in the evening I found out it wasn’t out yet.

Here are some photos of the inside pages of the book.

If you want to borrow these and post them on your website, please credit me/this site. Thank you!

I stumbled across this in my search for LULZY content for this website.
I read through all of Cleolinda’s Recaps of the Twilight Saga..and let me tell you. UNBELIEVABLE. So Amazing & Hilarious!
My favorites are Midnight Sun and then Breaking Dawn.

Twilight
New Moon
Eclipse
Breaking Dawn
Midnight Sun

Also, don’t forget to check out her Twilight Wiki, that explains some of the terms and other things that she has to say in her Recaps.

Enjoy!

Taken from Stony321 @ Livejournal.com This is all her, not me. But please read, it’s a very hilarious read.

LDS Sparkledammerung IS HERE!
The Secrets of the Sparkle a.k.a. TWILIGHT: STONIFIED (Image heavy)

The Secrets of the Sparkle a.k.a. TWILIGHT: STONIFIED (For real this time.)

So here’s the thing. I was going to be all whipping out the smart essay, pointing out all the subconscious LDS meta that SMeyers jammed in these books, showing how I thought she didn’t even realize what she was borrowing (because honestly, I just don’t think she’s smart enough to lay it out there, you know?) But here’s the thing:

THE BOOKS ARE REALLY REALLY DUMB. Like, “Strategery” dumb. (That’s a Dubya quote.) So I’m giving back at the same reading-comprehension level if you will. And you will. There’s so much dumb, in fact, that it will take a few posts to get it all out there. So here’s the first book and change.

Hold on, hold on, I need to keep setting the tone:

“Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful, beautiful sunset? And he’s carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he’s carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you’re drunk.” ~Jack Handy.

There is heavy word abuse in the book, so I’m trying to spare you that. They are “beautiful,” “perfect,” “chagrin,” and the one I wanted to scream every time I read it, “UGH.” Because cop fathers would clearly say repeatedly, “Ugh.” On with the show!

Stephenie Meyers (who claims that her name is spelled weird. [ETA: *I* spelled it wrong, but my point stands. One letter don't make it weird in that neck of the woods. Carry on! *G*] Um, only in Utah, lady. Which, here is an example of some typical Mormon/Utah names, all people that I KNOW:

• Jannilyn
• Randilynn (guess what her dad’s name is?)
• Faunette
• LaVonne
• Mohonri Morianchimer
• Aereign <– good fucking hell.)

Continues..please click MORE below to read the rest.
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Source: WSJ.com

By Willa Plank

Vintage

When pale and klutzy Belle Goose moves to Switchblade, Oregon, she becomes awestruck by Edwart Mullen, a computer geek who has no interest in girls and can play a mean triangle. So begins “Nightlight,” a parody of Stephenie Meyer’s “Twilight” written by The Harvard Lampoon. The book loosely follows Meyer’s storyline (girl meets boy, girl “unconditionally, irrevocably, impenetrably, heterogeneously, gynecologically, and disreputably” kissed by vampire-like boy), but adds a satiric twist. (Sample dialogue: Bella asks Edward, sorry, Edwart, why a giant wooden cross at the Mullen’s house is ironic. He replies: “Because we’re Jewish, of course–nonpracticing.”)

Though the Lampoon, which is run by Harvard students, publishes a humor magazine five times a year, “Nightlight” is the organization’s first novel parody in 4o years, the last book being “Bored of the Rings,” a send-up of J.R.R. Tolkien’s “Lord of the Rings.”
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